Helping People With Dementia – Advice on how to offer help to a demented person who does not want it.
Do you know someone with dementia or memory problems who refuses help? Here are some ways to support someone who may be in denial about their condition.
Helping People With Dementia
It is very common for someone living with dementia to deny that they have problems with memory or other aspects of cognition.
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This may be due to denial or lack of understanding. As with denial, a lack of understanding means that the person with dementia cannot recognize changes in their behavior and personality.
Continued denial can lead to problems in the person’s future. They may not accept help, there may be a delay in starting or stopping medication, or they may continue to drive even if it is unsafe for them to do so.
A person living with memory problems may deny that they have problems. This can be frustrating, especially if you’ve encouraged them to see their GP for a memory test.
Tip label: Tip. Talk to someone about memory problems Talk to someone about memory problems. If someone you know has memory problems, talking about it can help them get support. If these problems are affecting their daily life, you should encourage them to see their GP. Read more
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They may be aware of relationship issues and may be embarrassed or worried about it. I can also fear the future.
They may feel – or think that other people may feel – the stigma of being diagnosed with dementia.
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A person with a diagnosis can feel a range of emotions, from sadness to disbelief to denial.
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However the person feels about their diagnosis, try to stay calm while talking to them about how they’re feeling – this can help them calm down.
Denial can be helpful because it can give someone time to process the news and how they feel about it.
Tips What not to say to someone with dementia What not to say to someone with dementia. Tip A bad choice of language can be both painful and frustrating. Here we look at some words and questions to avoid. A bad choice of language can be both painful and frustrating. Here we look at some words and questions to avoid. … August 29, 2017 298 comments.
Giving the person time and space to think about their diagnosis and how they feel about it is a good way to approach the situation.
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There are a number of things you can do to support someone who is in denial about their dementia diagnosis or is refusing help.
It is important to try to talk to the person you are worried about and encourage them to go to the doctor themselves.
If that doesn’t work, you can talk to the person’s doctor yourself. So it’s best to get the person’s consent, or at least let them know you’re going to talk to their doctor. The doctor will then decide whether or not to disclose the information to the individual.
If you have questions about dementia, call our helpline to speak to our expert advisers or join the Dementia Talking Point to talk to others in your situation.
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When Heather O’Neil’s mother was diagnosed with dementia, art therapy helped her find purpose in her life again. Here are five of their favorite activities.
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In 2012, after many memory tests and finally a CT scan, my dear mother was diagnosed with complex dementia.
My stepfather suffers from a heart attack and is often sick, so when the memory of my mother really started to fade in 2014, I felt it was time for him to be closer to me. Along with cleaning, cooking, and shopping, the most important thing I do for my mom is to spend quality time with her every day for art and music.
My mother has always been a very creative person and she passed on her love of arts and crafts to me. I graduated in art and textile design in 1984, but for years my art was on the back burner. It only resurfaced when I discovered how invaluable art therapy can be for those with memory problems.
Of course, what works for one person may not work for another, but art therapy has helped my mom live a meaningful life, staying happy and engaged despite her condition. Here are her five favorite activities!
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My mother’s favorite hobby is making beautiful paper flowers. She loves making things to give to doctors and nurses… as well as dentists, opticians, hairdressers, friends and anyone who admires them!
I provide a cardboard template for the leaves and my mom will happily sit for hours cutting beautiful shapes out of brightly colored crepe paper. Together we stick the stems and leaves on the stems and when she finishes two or three with me, she can continue on her own. Beautiful paper flowers fill the house and are a constant reminder that she is incredibly creative.
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Mom may have forgotten to draw the picture herself, but she certainly didn’t forget to color it! The pencil is great to work with – so clean and easy to use. Instead of putting Mom’s creations in her coloring book or out of sight, we cut out her photos to use on handmade cards.
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We also frame her best pictures and display them on the wall as permanent reminders of her special talent.
Mom loves making handmade cards for every occasion! Although she can no longer make the designs herself, I make her a template that she uses to cut out ornaments and make cards. I find that making cards encourages mom’s self-expression and reduces her anxiety and depression. Cutting out designs helps with hand-eye coordination, while breaking up shapes helps with focus and comparison. This type of art therapy really gives my mom a sense of purpose, accomplishment, and pride!
Information label: Information. Activity groups – for people with dementia and their caregivers Activity groups – for people with dementia and their caregivers. From arts and crafts to other activities like hiking and yoga, we have a range of activities for everyone. Read more
I make sure we have a puzzle on the table every day so my mom can work on it whenever she feels like it, which stimulates her brain. We enjoy doing puzzles together, but it’s also an activity he likes to do on his own as long as they’re not too difficult. My mom can still manage 100 piece puzzles, but just barely. I’ll have to buy puzzles with fewer pieces soon so he doesn’t get discouraged and frustrated.
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This is another simple craft, but it’s so cute and so much fun to make! We turn our decorative shells into amazing bells, which give mom a wonderful sense of purpose and accomplishment. We also paint stones to make unique papers.
First, I emulsify the stones and draw flowers or cats on the pencils (two of my mom’s favorite things!), and then mom colors them with pencils and felt-tip pens. A quick application of polish and they will give you beautiful gifts that she will be proud of.
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