How To Deal With Difficult People At Work – “A foolish man hates his neighbor, but a man of understanding keeps silent.” —Proverbs 11:12
“Against criticism a man can neither protest nor defend himself; nevertheless he must act, and then it will gradually yield to him.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)
How To Deal With Difficult People At Work
“Be quick to agree with your enemy, when you are on the road with him. Otherwise the enemy will hand you over to the judge, and the judge will hand you over to the officer, and you will be thrown into prison. I tell you the truth, you will by no means come out of there unless you pay a large sum of money.” —Matthew 5:25-26
How To Deal With Difficult People At Work Ignoring Difficult People Is Not An Option If You Want To Succeed
“Say who you are and what you feel, because those who care don’t matter and those who matter don’t like.” – Dr. Seuss
“But as he that called you is holy, so be ye holy in all things.” —1 Peter 1:15
“Deliver me not from the wicked and the workers of iniquity, who speak peace to their neighbors, but in their hearts is calamity.” —Psalm 28:3
“Even a fool is wise when he is silent, and he who shuts his lips is wise.” —Proverbs 17:28
How To Win Over
“Because if you give a person love and kindness when he doesn’t deserve it by his actions, he will see that you probably really love him.” – Albert Ellis and Robert A. Harper,
“Nonviolence is not only the avoidance of external physical violence, but also the avoidance of internal mental violence. Not only do you refuse to shoot a man, but you refuse to hate him.” – Martin Luther King, Jr
“Some hold their tongue because they don’t need an answer, and some are silent, knowing their time.” —Ecclesiastes 20:6
“Nothing pleases a sick tongue so much as to find an angry heart.” -Thomas Fuller
Learn To Deal With Difficult People
“Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he may be, and he will be as he should be.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson Subscribe to your free remote team management training series Get five lessons and five tools delivered to your inbox over the next five weeks.
We all have little quirks that make us unique, but not everyone’s quirks are fun to deal with, which makes managing people challenging.
Difficult employees underperform and cause friction in the team, which can be difficult to deal with, especially as a new manager.
Dealing with these troubled employees is no easy task, so I’ve created a handy guide for you to use as you navigate your management journey.
Dealing With Difficult People In Life And Work
It is important to remember that when dealing with difficult employees, they are not always challenging on purpose.
Personal issues outside of work can cause employees to act out, but other times it’s something to do with the work environment that creates difficulties.
As a team leader, you need to understand your team members individually to get to the bottom of what makes them work.
4 Employee Personality Types: Understanding and Managing Different Personalities in the Workplace You’ll find that there are four main personality types you’ll encounter in the workplace, a D personality, an I personality, an S and a C.
How To Deal With Difficult People At Work Different Approach
Finally, a C personality is very detail oriented. They critique their own work and that of others and make sure everything is done perfectly.
Each of these personalities has strengths that contribute to the team, but when these personality types are not supported at work, they become difficult employees.
When a D is stuck in a bad work environment, they are often inconsiderate, rude, impatient, pushy, and aggressive, all of which classify an argumentative employee.
When an ego acts up, they are emotional, impulsive, excited and become the gossip of the office, just as you would characterize an immature employee.
Getting Along Toolkit: Practical Techniques For Dealing With Difficult People At Work
An S in a hostile environment appears isolated because when Ss are not supported they are indecisive, confused, slow and lack initiative.
Ultimately, an unsupported C becomes a “Negative Nancy” in a bad work environment because they are withdrawn, vindictive, critical, self-centered, and moody.
While these types of people are difficult to deal with, it’s important to remember that you can turn each of these personalities around and help them become the team members you need to succeed in your startup with the right coaching and support.
Before we get into the different coaching strategies for each difficult personality, let’s first address a broad strategy you should take when dealing with difficult employees.
Ep. 67: How To Work With Anyone (even Difficult People)
Before jumping to any conclusions; Start by taking the time to understand the team member’s situation.
As autonomous as we are, we are also victims of our environment. A team member’s environment may be at the root of the problem.
Gather the facts before judging your teammates. Ask other team members and colleagues about the problem employee and take the time to have one-on-one conversations with the employee to hear their side of the story.
By taking the time to understand how your team members feel about the situation, you show your support and create a psychologically safe environment in the process.
How To Manage Difficult People Ebook By Alan Fairweather
Once you understand what your team member is dealing with, it’s time for the two of you to develop a plan of action together.
Discuss whether you see your current team’s behavior as problematic and what you think their ideal behavior pattern would look like.
Then ask your team members what obstacles they face that prevent them from reaching ideal behavior patterns, and what you as their leader can do to help them overcome those obstacles.
After discussing what caused the problem, work with your teammates to develop a realistic solution. Identify the steps you need the employee to take to improve and what the likely end goal will be.
Useful Strategies To Dealing With Difficult People At Work
SMART goals are an effective way to help your team members achieve their goals, as they ensure a specific and achievable outcome within a realistic time frame that holds people accountable as they go through the process of achieving the goals.
Once you have an employee on track, be sure to check in with them about their progress.
Do you have a team member who likes to argue just for the sake of it? Of course some people argue on ideas and opinions, but others reason only out of habit. They fight over the most trivial things to create conflict.
Some people’s arguments come from something personal, and the root of the problem is much deeper than the surface anger they show.
Dealing With Difficult People
But there are ways you can handle a difficult person as a leader without feeling like their therapist.
Below I have collected three strategies from a study by Takebe & co. To help you manage a rational workforce.
One of the first steps in dealing with a difficult person is to hear their side of the story.
Takebe & co. According to, when people let their mind wander, it only makes it worse (Takebe & co, 2016), and it often manifests itself in other ways, such as beating or arguing with others.
How To Work With Difficult People
Hold calm and professional meetings with your team members and express concern for their well-being and work tasks.
When talking about an employee’s problematic behavior at work, be sure to comment on the action and not their character.
By sharing specific examples with your teammates, you can help them open their eyes to problematic behaviors they’ve been engaging in without realizing it.
The key point to remember is that it’s not you, it’s them, and you don’t need to be angry.
Practical Tips For Dealing With Difficult People At Work
You will remain neutral in the conversation with the employee to avoid taking things personally, which is necessary to get to the root of the problem and create an action plan.
Argumentative people don’t just make things up out of thin air. They pick up on something about what you did or said and use it against you in an aggressive way.
Instead of acting defensively against what they say, remind yourself that they want to reason and let go of the attack by letting go of the need to be right.
When it comes to arguing with an argumentative person, you are never right, even if you are.
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By asking them for feedback, you make it their opinion, which makes them more receptive to the feedback you share.
Article Reference: Takebe, M., Takahashi, F., & Sato, H. (2016). Anger rumination as a risk factor for symptom anger and anger-in: A longitudinal study. Personality and Individual Differences, 101, 451-455.
All you want to do is tell them to “grow up”. But you and I both know it won’t help.
Below, I share four strategies to help you deal with your immature teammate in a calm and collected manner. Continue reading to find out. 👇
Strategies For Dealing With Difficult People At Work — Leadership Impact Strategies
When this happens, they feel that their work does not matter. Who cares if someone’s work is only seen by 30 people and has no direct impact on anyone’s life, right? 🤷♂️
Therefore, you need to show your employees the importance of their work. Connect their work to the bigger picture and show them their impact on business operations.
When employees understand that their work plays a role in the bigger picture, they begin to care about their work and act professionally.
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